Of thoughts & tales

Pharmacy practice..

2009-05-04T23:27:00.005+08:00

Today I had my first official practical session for pharmacy practice. The whole 3 hours lab sessions was quite boring with lots of calculations and dose checking (we have to flip through the British National Formulary, which is like a dictionary for all drugs, and also other references like the British Pharmacopoiea, in which the content is so like a telephone directory!) so boring...

so this one is the British Pharmacopoiea, but we are using an older edition, and I hope we can access to this 2008 edition one day too- coz it looks not as boring with CDs available, haha..

And the only interesting thing we did for the labs is with the mortar and pestle, a very cute object, used to mix drug powders... =)

A fine Sunday... :)

2009-05-04T00:40:00.013+08:00

Today is Sunday! I had a really great time for service, Pastor's preaching about prayer really reminded us all about the importance of consistant prayer,

"A fire shall always be burning on the altar, it shall never go out." - Lev 6:13

Yeah...prayer shall be our lifestyle so we can continue to let that fire of passion burn so as to activate God's will in our lives!

***

Lunch has been great as well, we all- w22& w45, still never fail to stick together for lunch even after we have multiplied... With so many of us, when we arrive in front of Nando's restaurant, the waitress got a little shocked when cheryl told her we need a table for at least 15 people, and we were asked to wait outside for so so long... while they have to arrange a long long table to accomodate us all, cause we're bringing the 'whole kampung' there, haha...

***

And yeah recently I've had a new haircut, well besides cut it shorter, I have my hair straightened as well, the first few days my hair appeared so straight and so lesser in volume!!And I still can't get used to it...when I took a picture and look and compare, I laughed at myself non-stop, my hair is so much different and the change is just funny to me, cause I looked quite 'motherly' before I cut my hair, hahahaha... :D

Here's the before and after...

Actually it is not bad, at least not as messy as before.=)

exclusively classical =)

2009-05-01T13:26:00.018+08:00

Today is the 1st of May = holiday! :) Having a day specially off always feels like having a gift of extra time.

I have the day free for myself, just to relax... It is really good to have a quite and serene moments, I listen to songs that I've long never been in touch. And those songs never lost its beauty, each songs never lost its character. Each songs reminds me of a particular season of my life...

What I really love to do when I'm alone are:

~listening to classical songs (classical?? that sounds old right? but yes, I love them, and I grew up with them, beethoven rocks! lol)
~enjoying photos- reminiscences
~having my devotional time (I love to spend most of my personal time with God, continually seeking Him each day)
~playing violin (Yeah I love to listen to my own tune...I can play my own favourites freely :>)
~looking out of the windows- looking at the movements of every living things
~browsing my favourite websites
~reading magazines
~enjoying deserts

and continue with Mozart's concertos again :)

The Story of the Pencil

2009-01-29T14:18:00.003+08:00

Today I read something meaningful from Paulo Coelho's book, and here's a small passage to share with everyone! :D

A boy was watching his grandmother write a letter. At one point, he asked: " Are you writing a story about what we've done? Is it a story about me?" HIs grandmother stopped writing her letter and said to her grandson: " I am writing about you, actually, but more important than the words is the pencil I'm using. I hope you will be like this pencil when you grow up."

Intrigued, the boy looked at the pencil. It didn't seem very special.

"But it's just like any other pencil I've ever seen!"

"That depends on how you look at things. It has five qualities which, if you manage to hang on to them, will make you a person who is always at peace with the world."

1st quality: you are capable of great things, but you must never forget that there's a hand guiding your steps. We call that hand-God, and He always guides us according to His will.

2nd quality: now and then, I have to stop writing and use a sharpener. That makes the pencil suffer a little, but afterwards, he's much sharper. So you, too, must learn to bear certain pains and sorrows, because they will make you a better person.

3rd quality: the pencil always allows us to use an eraser to rub out any mistakes. This means that correcting something we did is not necessarily a bad thing; it helps to keep us on the right track.

4th quality: what really matters in a pencil is not its wooden exterior, but the graphite inside. So always pay attention to what is happeningg inside of you.

5th quality: it always leaves a mark. In just the same way, you should know that everything you do in life will leave a mark, so try to be conscious of that in your every action.

Let's be like a pencil too!

The very 1st month of 2009! :)

2009-01-26T00:13:00.011+08:00

Wow...so fast it's near the end of January already. This january has been a very new(haha...coz the in beginning of the year it always feels new), fun & busy month for me... :D

During the week before, we were having a fun time with our junior coursemates during their orientation. There were the "Happy Wierd Family day", "Pharmamusical night" - night with all the dance performance!, " Treasure Hunt", "Detective game", "Cultural runway" as well as "Spooky Friday Night"!

I had been doing the decorations together with my team! :)

and more... haha. We did the stage decorations for 4 of the different nights. My art skill has improved after doing so many i guess, kakaka... :P

And during the finale night, yeah i took part in some performances.. I still remember me and jiayee was feeling super anxious before we perform.. And for the first song "Salut d' amour" we really played while feeling kan chiong at the same time.. And then the second song was rather enjoying, haha. We played a jazzy song for the second one. It was great and some of them even came out near the stage there to dance along the music!

My friend took some of our photos but see!! i was blocked by the.......

mike stand! haha... *sweat*...

Other than that, we have been performing dance for our juniors as well. Enjoy!

You know better than I

2008-11-02T23:42:00.003+08:00

Love this song... It's from the story Joseph: Kings of Dreams (2000)

You Know Better Than I

I thought I did what's right

I thought I had the answers

I thought I chose the surest road

But that road brought me here.

So I put up a fight

And told You how to help me

And just when I had given up

The truth is coming clear, for:

You know Better Than I

You know the way

I've let go the need to know why

For You know Better Than I

If this has been a test

I cannot see the reason

But maybe knowing "I don't know"

Is part of getting through

I try to do what's best

And faith has made it easy

To see the best thing

I can doIs put my trust in You, for:

You know Better Than I

You know the way

I've let go the need to know why

For You know Better Than I

I saw one cloud, and thought it was the sky

I saw a bird and thought that I could follow

But it was You who taught that bird to fly

If I let You reach me,Will You teach me? For:

You know Better Than I

You know the wayI've let go the need to know why

I'll take what answers You supply

You know Better Than I

Open PSD files without having to use Photoshop :P

2008-10-30T15:21:00.007+08:00

Just want to share some good & friendly software with all. Today I tried to open a PSD (Photoshop) file but I do not have the photoshop software in my compuuter! Thus I went online to download... wait...download...setup. But failed..and it took so long.. :'(

Anyway I found a rather useful software which has a nice array of features that include image viewing, management, comparison, red-eye removal, emailing, resizing, cropping and color adjustments. It provides quick access to thumbnail browser, means can view all the files in thumbnail view and can straight away select. Besides that, it has got small small functionalities buttons via hidden toolbars that pop up when your mouse touches the four edges of the screen. It can support a lot of formats & very friendly. wow! It is the FastStone Image Viewer! lols..

Download FastStone Image Viewer :)

well and the next one is GIMP!

GIMP is a multifunctional photo editing software. Can open PSD files, can correct distortion, can convert images formats etc. It can also be used as a simple paint program, multifunctional! Nice. :)

Download GIMP!

amazing girl..

2008-10-18T23:11:00.004+08:00

she is so so amazing!! I came across this in You Tube. A 5 year-old girl playing with a full orchestra! Her violin is very small, only a 1/8 size, i believe she will give a blast when she plays on a full size violin when she grows up. She truly plays very well at only 5...wow~
Enjoy this video~!!

I am thinking...

2008-10-17T01:35:00.003+08:00

I want to do more
To have more time
To do greater things for the greatest purpose, not of mine but His
To get my heart right...well is it on the track?
I know I am not perfect, i'm just trying to belong to what I dream of

everyone needs each other
we share love & passion
our cheers are the fuel for each other...

It's all about relationship
my loved ones..mom and dad
My brothers, my sister,
i miss them more than i say...

I still have God
His promises and the way He is
He sees me through the season
He brought me thus far
I waited and it was worthwhile
He has His special way,
which is always beyond my wisdom

You have brought me thus far..I will not trade off any of these things

attitude matters!

2008-10-02T20:53:00.005+08:00

Uh..oo..i accidentally deleted all the gadgets for the side-bars for my blog.. *sob...* All my blog-links, blog lists, clock...are gone just like that. Ahhh...gonna build up the side-bars all over again.

Lately most of my days are filled with physiology, ya just physiology.. My physio exam is coming soon... and it was not that easy to study the chapters as i thought it was, especially the cardiovascular and immunology chapters... what to say, they are just complicated.. >_<

Everytime when i'm tired of studying, i'd always dream of doing something else, sometimes i'd share with friends who are also struggling with exams, and may be that helped me to relax better... haha.. I relized that I always limit myself, i always aim and hope for a moderate result, which is an okay result. "That'd be good enough already," I always thought to myself. May be that helps me to be not so stress... But i should give my best!! NOT 'just nice' only..

The study break this time round is not that bad, i have learned to be more focused. It's important to always be prepared in everything i do. That should be a way of life. Getting your heart prepared before doing something would make a lot of difference in the outcome of the thing you are doing after that! No wonder everytime in choir practice, in cellgroup or prayer meetings, when the people are prepared by heart, and are expecting great things in heart, the atmosphere would be so different and the outcomes are always fruitful. Before attending lecture classes, when a person is all ready and all prepared, indeed he/she will receive more and learn more then others. That's just so true but not everyone are carrying that attitude when it comes to learning or working. One's attitude will determine his altitude in life, as pastor have always preached. We ought to always be prepared mentally, spiritually and physically in everything we do!!

My B"DAY ^-^

2008-08-19T19:26:00.006+08:00

Whow whow~~ this year's bday was great! I'm really really happy to have so many people around me to celebrate with me. I was blessed with a lot of presents as well! =) Felt so loved by so many of you guys!! Thank you everyone!

Celebrated my b'day with my family members @ Swensons :)

i've got ice cream cake for my b'day the first time! :)

my best ever W22 cell group! They all threw me a surprise as well!! :) They off the lights and.... SHAHH>>>> the birthday cake appear!! haha.

my birthday cake- very nice right? Full of pretty decorations! And they are yummy^^

1..2..3 bLow```

my W22 family... Yeah!

all my beloved friends at university throw me a celebration as well. ^-^

and they all sang the b'day song so loud...!! i still remember how other people who were playing chess on the other side near us TURN and STARE at us... haha.

here's our group picture..

and a random one... ^-^

a big THANK YOU to everyone for all the surprises and being there to celebrate my 21st..

just want to tell you guys that I love u all! =)

The leadership training trip

2008-07-22T22:39:00.006+08:00

The trip to genting for IMU leadership training was over some time already, anyway the photos we took are just worth posting up here... for memory and to laugh at...lol. I got to know a lot of new friends during that 2 days & 1 night. I thought all of us will be 'inspired' to go genting at midnight, since we were so near to Awana already, but we didn't.. after we made some rationale thinking about the transport inconveniences...aih..aih.. Well finally we ended up playing mafia through the night...

And I couldn't forget about the personality test too! The DiSC profiling had brought us the deepest insight into our own personality, ever!! and it was really interesting to found out about the unique part of ourself, though we do not own every 'good traits', haha...

Sin Wei...we almost can't see your face already...haha

The twins 'superwomen' appeared in the bus

Below are Pei Jia & Jenny from the 70's =P

Now it's all about black & pink! =)

Guess who are they?

holiday in singapore

2008-06-05T21:56:00.009+08:00

Wow.. my 1 month holiday is ending soon... It has been a month of "at home" & "at work".. I am doing a lot of editorial work for my brother's office.. Though the work load seems not much, but it's very time consuming and it's a repetition of researching online, and writing with almost the same format.

Besides working, some of the days i was rotting..sleeping..chatting.. The things that I still stay discipline is going to church, learning music and doing bible study. haha..at least i didn't wasted all of my time... And i get to study closer to God's word recently during holiday time..and it's amazing that the more i explore, i gain more of it, even from the same verses..! His wisdom is so much beyond ours, and it's so important that we understand His words when we hear or see it, it is a real blessing to understand the hidden treasure in the bible..

Anyway I still can't refrain from pampering myself by having myself to sleep 'with freedom' as in sleep until only when i feel like getting up, for most of the days... But i didn't sleep till noon normally, for a reason, haha, because breakfast is really my favourite meal, and there is nothing more enjoyable than me enjoying slow & easy breakfast with my family each morning.

Last week had been a memorable family trip to singapore. My elder brother and his family is staying there, and we had wait till holiday season to travel there just to see them all in person, to catch up with one another. And our visit is especially to meet my little niece and nephew over there, they are just so cute and adorable. i miss them dearly now...

Introducing my niece, Cathryn. A 3 y.o. big girl now! She is always so gentle and speaks so softly.. And my brother jokingly describe that her teacher may not know she already answers a question even after she did....lol. She is just so lovely.. =)

Meet my nephew, Christof! I love and miss him dearly..a chubby little baby boy... chris chris..

And I had a lot of fun being an 'aunty' to so many niece and nephews. They are just so happy and lovable... (^.^)

All my three nephews! small..medium..high! 1..2..3! =D

And here's another photo i cant help but wanna post up, here is little jiale looking back with a handsome smile. hahaha...

final week of 1st sem!

2008-04-10T00:10:00.006+08:00

It is our final week of 1st semester at imu...what to do? take photos loh!!

Me and Leslie was crazy about the decoration down the atrium... wanted to take photo of it with us inside!! Not that succesful though.. quite hard to squeeze all in.. kakaka..

finally this one looks better.. =)

it was the last lab session of 1st semester for gruop C&D,hehe...

well and it's us, a symmetrical pose...hahaha...

that was it, and outside was raining so heavily that day when we wanted to go back home... the day was a memorable one... =) and thanks to Kelvin our very kind photographer!

Pharmacy night *

2008-04-09T23:23:00.004+08:00

Here I want to share some photos about recent life in my uni... On the 31st of last month, my batch's people made up a committee to hold a so called "Pharmacy Night". It is a night specially for our seniors who are leaving imu soon to overseas for further studies. It was a casual farewell dinner night, with quite a lot of performances, like singing, music band, dance, chinese yo-yo, and I was glad also to contribute for the programme, playing a few songs- Secret by JayChou and another title also by JayChou.. It was my first violin performance at imu!! Hehe... hope next time I'll perform an even better one! I always wanted to own a electric violin where I can really play pop songs really nicely in style.. Classical violin is just so 'classic', cannot be jazzy or pop... the sound of a classical violin are so made for playing Bach, Beethoven... So, that is on my wish list.lol

this was me playing violin with piano accompaniment by my friends.. all these pictures below is not very clear though, with dim light, kinda romantic, haha...

and here are Melissa, Wai Hong singing & YiZhe..playing the piano..

plus other performances...

It was a great night with good respond!! And all the best to all the seniors who will fly overseas soon... =)

Pre Exam Syndrome...lol

2008-04-09T00:55:00.009+08:00

Hmm.. most of the time when I study before an exam, I will have sudden indulgence for something, e.g. wanted to eat laksa from Penang, wanted to buy a particular item, wanted to go to Cameron Highlands etc etc...

Haha..and luckily this time my wish is easy to be satisfied. Last Sunday night before the exam on Monday I wanted to eat the carrot cheese brownies.. and the walnut brownies

.... so SO MUCH !!

And finally I am eating them... happy!!

well and i've finished the whole slice of walnut brownies just now, feel so satisfied now..

thoughts in mind @ faith in heart

2008-04-08T21:56:00.003+08:00

Time flies...this week is already the last week of my 1st semester in IMU. And my following weeks will be study break before End of Sem exam!! And it will be a period of "determination and will power test" again, hahaha.. coz each time studying before exam I need to struggle not to fall asleep (while studying) with enough 'will power', lol

Lately I checked on the way I think 'now'. I realised the way I think changed bit by bit as I live life from day to day. So I realised it's really a good thing to blog frequently when time allows - to keep track of my thoughts and memories, reminding me of my weaknesses and strengths, not forgetting the lesson of appreciation. I found out the reason of me not blogging consistently is only because of two factors : either I am busy or I am unwilling... Unwilling in a way that I'm not so used to really share out most of my thoughts publicly. That was a blocking stone... now I think I'm slowly comfortable with journaling publicly....to drop my thoughts somewhere so I can have a better view of my life.

Well to sum up my personal updates, I experience a big change in the way I think about life and the way I live life, my personal interest had also changed. I never blog in detail about my spiritual growth before, it's quite abstract, like a story to be told but before that it needs time to build its chapters...until now.

And it all starts at the point I allow myself to experience God. It's pretty amazing how God had lead me since my first step of faith. To date back, I remember it was not a 100% of faith at that time. It was a desire that burst from within me to want to 'get hold of ' this amazing God during the first time I felt His presence... And then, I acccepted Christ with some kind of trust, not actually knowing much about Him. Nevertheless I didn't sportingly tell most of my old friends about my faith, except a few, i'm just not confident enough, and was so scared about how others will think about me.. It took me quite a long time before I was so confident about my faith in Christ. I continued to search for more of Him, and God works through me in an amazing way over time, without me realising it...And that's the special way of God..

I believe that God has me in mind since the beginning also! I know He has a chosen path for me, and everything and everyone who came into my life was not by coincident afterall. I'm really thankful to have a great family of God - W22 cell group and CHC! =) a bunch of "sot-kays" who helped me a lot in my spiritual growth! haha.... God was always there to help me stand firm by faith in times when I face struggles... I need to really trust Him to keep on going...

Yup... I will trust Him.

A long silence

2008-04-03T18:25:00.002+08:00

What a long silence... Weeks and days full of bioscience, biochemistry, physiology and all had kind of put me off blogging for quite a long time. And tomorrow, will be that very challenging physio essay coming, and there's more to come after this week, aih...

I came across a few flash videos which are really nice and meaningful, they speaks to my heart, wanted to share that in my cell group website, but end up a failure to link it. I'm still so 'internet-blind'.. gotta learn more about uploading and linking stuff & adding gadgets to blogs...

Photos in Switzerland

2007-08-21T13:44:00.001+08:00

I went to Switzerland for holiday from the 8th of July to the 15th of August...Here are a part of the photos of vacation in Switzerland....I hope you'll enjoy them!! :)

(not yet all though..)

To Jungfrau, Switzerland

2007-08-21T13:01:00.000+08:00

Enjoying lunch here at Jungfrau...it's the German Speciality...it's really delicious..

Wee....happy to take photos with those beautiful mountains

Me, my sister & Kiana

The fresh grassland of Switzerland
All the cows here at Switzerland wear bells around their neck.. this cows is walking nearer and nearer towards me when we are taking photos...i'm a bit scared lah...am i look like something nice to eat?? Haha

The scenery is really amazing..behind me is two of the famous mountain named Jungfrau & Monk
And there's a restaurant up here too..
I love the colour of the nature- very blue and very green. That's the perfect match of colours!

Wohoo... it's kinda cold up there at over 2500m high above sea level...

Nice...captivating scenery

See those little animals...they are the cows enjoying the summer grass

There's like heaven on earth..really..

Bern

2007-08-12T03:18:00.000+08:00

Bern is the capital city of Switzerland... it's a German speaking town. And we took a long walk along the pedestrian path...there are a lot of tourist there too...

The very famous street here in Bern

This clock is famous too for its music- it plays very nice music on every hour sharp and the little dolls on the clock will also dance around..

The small fountain...the water from most of the fountain in Switzerland is clean enough to be consumed...hu hu..

Aubonne

2007-08-12T02:56:00.000+08:00

Took a visit around the place where my sister stay-Aubonne on 2nd day before my departure.. visited a few places and a park nearby... We went jungle trekking too...

Here looks like a golf resort...ha ha

In front of a house in Aubonne, i like the colour of this house so took a shot in front of it..ha ha

Halfway on our way up the mountain..

Hm...relaxing beside a pond..

Overflowing with blessings....

2007-08-08T17:04:00.000+08:00

Having travelled in Switzerland & Italy for one month, I discovered a lot of things, learned new experiences, and experienced God too. It may sound wierd I have said that, but knowing more about God is what I get the most for this month, of course i enjoyed every beauty, every taste and every smell too here in Switzerland. :) I thank God for it. "God....generously gives us everything for our enjoyment"... The very relaxing and tranquil lifestyle here plus the fact that i'm here for vacation gives a heavenly place & time for me to refresh my mind. I can see through my life in a much more clear way and God brought me to enjoy & see the world in a bird's eyes view too. I got the chance to visit a few fascinating places high up in the mountain, up to 2500 metre high or 6000 ft above ground, and I am equipped with a relaxed mind to enjoy on every details of the earth. =) I discovered things from a different perspective of life, of the greatness of God, of purposes, of hope and our relatioships with the people we love around us. I see different people live for different things, some found reason in their kids, some found reason in their work and some live because of their loved ones...
I spend this one month feeling like dreaming. I decided to visit Switzerland in quite a rush and without much expectation, thus everyday is a surprise! =) This is my first time travelling fully sponsored and with much satisfaction.
My relationship with my sister get deeper & better too. We both have quite the similar 'feel' & humour about about most things. We can share a lot of things together openly, because we are no enemy at all, he he! I am glad to have her as my sister and she's happy to have me too. My sister said it's very hard to have a person in your life who understand you well. We may meet a lot of friends in our lives but mostly will be just our 'temporary companions' who'll be there in just a moment of our lives. That means it's pretty difficult to have an intimate friend forever, or an ideal partner in life, because normally people are not 100% sincere. That sounds sad & cruel right? Ha ha. I also of course do hold some things back and have some secrets to myself, too. Sometimes i really wish i could share and tell a lot of things to someone whom i trust wholly without have to hold back anything. Hu hu.=)
I hope i will be able to have enough time to write some account of my visit in Switzerland and other places in this blog for memories. Perhaps i could find time when i'm back home. ~

Here at Switzerland... =)

2007-07-11T17:54:00.000+08:00

Reached here safely at Switzerland on Sunday. It had been quite a long hours of flight and i didn't sleep well on the plane. But i enjoyed travelling by myself very much. It had been an adventurous one. =) On my first flight, i met a doctor, Hui Min. She's heading to Glasgow and she had been working there for the fourth year. It was so lucky to met her as it's a plus to get to know more about Glasgow as she shared a lot of her experiences with me. :) Then while transit at the Dubai International airport, i got the opportunity to visit this large and well known airport. The airport was packed with people, different kinds of people from different country, everyone transit their flight there. And last two days sister brought me aroung the town of Aubonne, where we are staying now, and we did a lot of shopping here at Coop shopping centre and Migros shopping centre. Here these two shopping centre are the most well known. And along the highway while we travel i can see the IKEA furniture shopping mall and the Fedex courier service centre. Both these company originated from Europe!

Yesterday sister, Kiana and i went to enjoy hot spa swimming and bath at a place they called the Central Thermo, at the town of Yverdon. The place is about 45 minutes drive from sister's place. Hm...and we really had a good relaxing time there, to immerse ourselves in the warmth of the pool of water, enjoying the massage, in the cold weather of 11°c. Cool!

Anyway, today, actually since last night, i was not feeling well, and today, i'm sick....sad... and today the whole day i have to rest and rest well. Today i woke up with fever and sore throat and sneezing.. That's fast! Within one day i got so ill... Now in the afternoon i got much bettter.. hopefully tomorrow i'll recover, or else the trip to Geneva has to be cancelled....

Yesterday..at night, sister and i got into a heart to heart talk about religion stuff, it's all complicated... Why can't everyone on earth belief and worship only one God? If there's only one God and one concept, then it'll be so much direct and simple. haiz....

Island - a wonderful place to go

2007-07-05T16:54:00.000+08:00

It has been a blessing for me to have the chance to enjoy a trip to Perhantian Island, Redang Island and Lang Tengah with my friends. This time we have fifteen of us going and we have everyone travelling in a speed boat whenever we want to travel from one Island to another! It's like having our very own speed boat to fetch us- the whole family of friends to start off our "island adventure" ! The trip was both amazing and like having a dream. This is my first ever experience snorkelling in the deep blue sea...and feel like day dreaming as i look into the wonderful world under the surface of the sea. I'm so amazed at the colourful creatures God has created on earth, every beautiful things doesn't happen by chance but by the mighty work of God. It's very enjoyable to be surrounded by varieties of fishes, and i'm so so happy to have the chance to see the crown fish (Nemo) with my own eyes!! Plus the opportunity to have a minute's look at the big turtle even brought more to my heart's satisfaction! Although the snorkelling trip had let most of us felt so tired, and the chalet room with no air-cond ( which is a little pity, ha ha), but it's worthwile afterall.. :) i enjoyed the trip very much, and the photos would be our very precious memories when we look back at them again in the future!

Ocean Deep

2007-06-13T19:32:00.000+08:00

I hate the feeling, the unsecure feeling in searching something in life,
I want to just let my life to be like a glass bottle,
floating on the surface of the sea & let the wave to bring me somewhere, anywhere...
the ocean below's just too deep and complicated,
life would be far more easier if i don't take every little thing too seriously,
just be simple...
a big thanks to my dear friends, i can really share everything without have to hold back.... "huggies"=)

I found this song really nice, the lyrics are soft & beautiful

OCEAN DEEP
Love , can't you see I'm alone
Can't you give this fool a chance
A little love is all I ask
A little kindness in the night
Please don't leave me behind
No , don't tell me love is blind
A little love is all I askAnd that is all
Ooh love , I've been searchin' so long
I've been searchin' high and low
And little love is all I ask
A little sadness when you go
Maybe you'll need a friend
Only please don't let's pretend
A little love is all I askAnd that is all**
I wanna spread my wings
But I just can't flyAs a string of pearls
The pretty girls go sailin' by##
Ocean deep
I'm so afraid to show my feelings
I have sailed a million ceilings
Solitary room
Ocean deep
Will I ever find a lover
Maybe he has found another
And as I cry myself to sleep
I know this love of mine
I'll keep
Ocean deep
Now , can't you hear when I call
Can't you hear the word I say
A little love is all I ask
A little feelin' when we touch
Why am I still alone
I've got a heart without a home
A little love is all I askAnd that is all

life..

2007-06-12T15:50:00.000+08:00

all this while i had been struggling within myself, all problems on relationships and beliefs and about life has come to me all at once..
it's all personal and seems ridiculous after i look back at it when time has passed,
it's just the expected experiences in life after all...
I must think more simple and relax and never think forward too much, life would be much easier if i didn't take every small things in life too seriously, right? Ha ha. :)
now gonna immerse myself in books-biology and chem and maths...

2007-02-04T20:22:00.000+08:00

Got a bunch of mixed feelings recently. It's not the simple one as before. I can't find out why though. May be it's a result of different things different ways different lives... Feel like senseless sometimes. Tomorrow's not really apparent and the world is encumbering itself.

Justice justice justice...

2007-01-24T18:51:00.000+08:00

Arggh....really sick in the process of finding info for ethics presentation.. Concept of Justice? Community Justice? Justice System? Justice in Islam? Socialism? Why i need to spend so much time finding those things? Haiyo... yahoo.com, dogpile.com...all are nightmares as searching tools alone. those info? Nothing and boring.

Everyday problem.

2007-01-18T18:12:00.000+08:00

a lifetime problem....Having palmer hyperhidrosis is really a profound and dramatic experience. Palmer hyperhydrosis? That's the name of my problem. This is a condition has been detected in my early childhood. My palm can just sweat without a reason, sometimes can be for the whole day, I know that seem very unhygiene or dislike for most people. If you can't bear with me, that's it, i don't care much now. I'm actually constantly aware of this condition of my hands and I know I can undergo a surgery to overcome my problem, it's known as Endoscopic Thoracoscopic Sympathectomy. The percentage of success case is 98%. It's said to be safe too. Anyway, it's considered a major one anyway, plus some side effects like chest or back sweating, wound infection,..... Do you think it's worth to take that?

2007-01-08T20:14:00.000+08:00

Why i never blog for so long ya? The main thing's that my computer has long been moved out of my house and now, the internet connection in my house has been terminated. Pity me... and i'm quite tired with the idea of having to spend RM2 for every hour of internet surfing at the internet cafe. Yearning to get a new laptop for myself.
Again, one more material desire. I just like to buy things and things and things, i might turn up to be the next 'shopaholic' soon, very soon. I really enjoy shopping, very much i can say, when i'm financially okay. Not good oh...always can't resist the urge to buy new things. Ho.....

My papa

2006-11-30T16:24:00.000+08:00

About my dad's health condition, it's already not a new concern to me. Though his health level is considered good now, nothing to be worried much, but every time i see him, i would feel guilty as his daughter. I'm sure that he's not as strong as before, i'm very clear that he already reached his 'golden age', and i always feel his muscles and body just need rest but not too much rest too, ha ha. some healthy, relaxing and mind-challenging activities must be available to him to have his time occupied. I wish so much that i can afford to give him the best health and best pleasures in life, like buy him his most favourite books, the nicest sofa, a big and comfort house, and anything he likes, no matter how expensive those things'll be. But in the real world there's the real fact that i have no such financial ability. When will i have that ability? i'm clear about that, i still have a long time to go before i'm financially independent. But i just wish it could be now, he just deserved to enjoy the best now. I think too far may be, but i'll just have more and more of that feeling as i see him grow older and older....i feel guilty too sometimes if he cares and do too much things for me... I'll try my best to give you the best, ya.

4th Day-23rd Nov

2006-11-30T16:08:00.000+08:00

The last day, we visited the medical ward and surgery ward in the morning to get an insight into the doctors' daily working routine in the ward. However, we are left there doing nothing and we can't help up on anything (of course, coz we don't have the required skills) although deep inside our heart we yearned so much to reach out. We just have some chatting with the patients and try to attend to their basic needs, and got bored so fast. The session also ends early...ha..
Visited frineds in UM too, and joined them to the human boday specimen hall where they studied anotomy there. The specimens there had been left for almost 2 decades and the body texture became almost like soil. From soil men were made and to dust they'll return, now i realized how true it's!
The meaning of life to me has changed somehow...got to see life from another perspective now. =)

3rd day..-22nd Nov.

2006-11-27T17:31:00.000+08:00

It's the 3rd day, we are brought to the pathology department today. we visited the histopathology and cytology lab irst. The histology lab is where the fixation of the specimen is done by using a solution of 10% formalin, followed by the proces of waxing, thinning up to 4 um and finally staining with Xerin and other stains which i don't know how to name them. The observation of the nucleus of specimen under microscope will tell everything about the result. Abnormal cell will have different/unusual nuclear-membrane proportion and the nuclear envelope'll be unclear. The cell specimen can also be cut into only 1.5 um using () The whole process can be done in only 10 mins but only for emergency case as it involves very high cost.. While at the histopathology lab2, specimens are further processed, and here the diagnosis are done. The staining process involved more complex colour stain. AT the cytology lab the cel is studied under microscope. There's also TV screen for microscopic view. Learn quite a lot at the labs here.
After that, the most exciting part came, we have the chane to witness a post-mortem. A male Bangladeshi at the age of 30 sth died suddenly at home on the day before, he is suspected alleged poisonous. The whole process is very suspending. The whole body is cut half, ribs are cut open in the middle then all the fresh organs are taken out, even the brain! I've seen all the real organs for the first time ever, and i will never forget about that scence...The organs are examined thoroughly, all parts are cut into pieces to check on. We are all so stunned to have viewed the whole thing. The face expression of the diseased is still clear in my mind till now and i just hope I won't have any nightmare about this.. Haha...

2nd day- 21st Nov

2006-11-27T16:20:00.000+08:00

Feeling reluctantly, we start our second day in hospital. Today we spent the whole day at the Rehabilitation department. We have a chance to glance over the wound washing of diabetic patient by staff nurse. We are then brought to ward 8U where we saw patient who sufferred from stroke, some got half-paralysed or paralysed down the waist and some lost their muscle strength. We studied how the facilities in the ward is designed to suit their special needs.
We also visited neurotherapy clinic and a small gym where patients undergo exercises with weighing bags to strengthen their muscle. For patient who can't stand on their feet, they need to exercise on a device which'll incline a little by little to help them support on their feet. The hospital also do rehabilitaton for stroke patient, they need to exercise their hands and turn their body to prevent their muscle from losing strength, although the patient'll be in great pain to do that. I feel pity to one pak cik who sufferred so much because of stroke. Hai... We also visited the occupation therapy clinic where hyperactive children or children with slow development( mentally disabled) is treated. The orthopedic clinic is also an important and only workshop in the hospital where false legs are moulded. At noon, we attend a lecture on rehabilitation and we learnt how disabled persons of various cases make their way towards independent life. An economic graduate who had lost all his arms and legs still face his life optimistically and survived and is mobile in his wheelchair which he controlled by using only his chin. It's an inspiring lecture for us.
In the afternoon, we visited the orthopedic clinic again but a different one and lastly we witnessed a minor surgery in the operation room. Witnessed the whole process and the doctors are really very professional. Finally, a sag is taken out from the patient's right wrist, and it's said to be a ganglion... Quite scary to see the doctor pull open the flesh wide, huh... but it's not a bloody surgery though, but i can still feel the tense in the room..Haha..

First day..-20th Nov

2006-11-27T15:18:00.000+08:00

I've lost touch with this blogsite for quite a time. That's because i have been busy all week. First with my hospital attachment, then i ended last week with illness. I suppose i've got some eye-infection from the hospital and i even had vomitted a few times to be serious enough to get an injection on my butt, ha ha. But thank God i'm okay now.

The UM Medical Centre is a good training ground for apprentice doctors and specialists with various departments. There's the UM Specialist Centre which caters for ONG, Otorhinolaryngology(ENT) and Ophthalmology(Eye). And there are even kiosks and Delifrance in the hospital, which i never thought of.
The staff in charged for our attachment "tour" first brought us to the surgery department where we have the chance to visit most of the area of operation department. The operation region is isolated from the outside atmosphere by having its own internal air circulation system. Doors are set to close automatically all the time, and all windows are closed. The air is recleansed cotinuously to minimise infection. There's the pre-operation region where patients who are about to undergo operation is given thorough body check-up on blood pressure, heart pulse, breathing condition and so on. We also learnt that there are 3 operation theatres among 16 o.t. which are reserved for emergency case. As for the patients who has undergone operation will be placed in a region of 'post-operation' where they'll be attended by personal medical staff for detailed care until their 'critical moments' is over. Besides that, we have the chance to visit one of the o.t. but an empty one, that o.t. is meant for emergency use, we are not allowed to enter the other o.t. which are on operation as we've missed the time. Sigh...
In the afternoon, we visited the out patient department. There's a special clinic which's meant for T.B. patient. The T.B. patient is adviced to receive regular consultation but have to collect their medication from the consultant itself as the T.B. can be infected through air contaction and thus they are best to avoid from going to public places for other patients' safety. Besides that, we also went to the outpatient and inpatient worklab of pharmacy department. We learnt how the medicine are dispensed accordingly and how the system works.
Feeling tired at the end of the day with some disappointment as we didn't learn much as we had expected and may be because some of the staff just treat us lightly..

What is music to you?

2006-11-16T16:40:00.000+08:00

Music is freedom that relentlessly exists
Freedom of speech
Freedom of thought
Freedom of creativity
Freedom of imagination

Music is ever soothingly healing
A bombardment of on-going expression of feelings

Music is a tool of unity
Always bringing people together as family
Hence be described as a mentor of spirituality

Music is magic
Performing its tricks
With sweet instrumental tones and lyrics
Emotionally captivating and positively distracting
Music is a form of beautiful art

Music is an angel
Singing out from the skies as she flies
Music is love
the food of all moods

Get up...

2006-11-14T15:24:00.000+08:00

Holidays...the pace's just so slow...so slow that make me so lag. Feel myself doing nothing all days. I can't find anything more interesting than online and movie. I even watched discovery for hours. Whoa.....sometimes feel bored until i feel myself so old. No, no, i'm just making myself boring because my mind thinks i'll be boring. Stop that ok?
I still remember, there's one line i heard which roughly means never stop doing things too long or you will lose the momentum to go on. Everyday should be organised and things should be prioritised or else you'll end up unproductive-uninterested-boring-sleeping. I know, i know, i'm just so lazy to do things i should do to achieve things i dreamt of. So, please get up and move on to do something ya...

nasty...

2006-11-12T16:32:00.000+08:00

...everyone has different mindset, and people with different level of wisdom really think differently. And ya, it's not easy to communicate with people with different mindset. Okay, it's not hard to 'communicate', but the topics of conversation will be 'nothing' to me. May be you'll think i'm so arrogant, so it's my fault. Ya, i don't know what 's wrong with me, but i just find it hard to be respectful. I didn't do anything but i've done something to one's feelings. who knows?

another half round

2006-11-03T20:57:00.000+08:00

Whoa...still have to battle for one week, during the exam season, you can sense the power of exam, how it can influence every candidate’s life. Most people’s lifestyle will change entirely, we’ll do things we won’t do normally, and the most important thing is that we’ll give up doing things which we’ll normally do. The probability of me reading newspapers or story books decrease to almost <10% out of 100 during exam time, I just don’t have the mood to read even the interesting fiction or watch my favourite movie. I just want this season to be over faster. This semester’s going to end soon though. I’ve learned to enjoy life entirely as a student boarding outside home finally starting this semester and this semester seems to end a bit too fast for me. My ability to adapt to a new environment here is just so poor that I just really really start to settle myself comfortably this semester.
Hope this weekend will be a beautiful weekend.

Beautiful spain..

2006-11-03T20:33:00.000+08:00

the nice blue sea...

Far..far..

2006-10-29T17:49:00.000+08:00

It's really not easy to blog regularly, the internet cafe's closed all this while and when the cafe finally reopens, the blogger.com lost connection after i finish typing a post ready to be published. hoo... It's really funny to find out blogger.com can lost connection with the server. My blog have been refused for so many times...haiz..
Really miss my sister after receiving photos from her after they ended their autumn holiday in Spain. Spain...seems a place really far away from me... What i know about Spain is just it's medditeranean climate and the very nice and peace deep blue sea..very nice...and clear. Why can't all the places in the world have unpolluted sea like this? Every drops of pure sea water... Really miss you, my sister. but why everytime wheen we chat through the phone, it's just quite hard to find our common interests topic....because of distance??..We seems to be so formal and just cant talk deep into the topics of our hearts...

Blog?

2006-10-29T17:24:00.000+08:00

Normally people blog because they want their thoughts to be heard, and yes, i do want my thoughts to be shared, and perhaps get some comment from it. A blogsite should be a place that can let you let off steam when you face any angry, sad or unjust situation. All my blogs will be my personal feelings and opinions, however, in order not to offend someone or touch any sensitive issue, there's quite a lot of limits to adhere when i'm penning my thoughts...and sometimes things may be exaggerated, all bloggers have moral responsibility for what they write, should i continue to voice my thoughts on this platform, or maybe i blog in a very vague way? Here i apologise first if i happen to offend someone here in the future. =)

oh,finally....

2006-10-16T17:30:00.000+08:00

Here it is, my first ever blog in my life. I finally able to snatch some time in this afternoon to create a blog spot personally for myself. I've been long wondering why some people are like 'can't live without blogging'. And now i know. It's actually such a good idea to keep your thoughts in words, i don't want my memories, good or bad, just pass by without any footprints. When you left no footprints, no way you can retrieve it, right? This reminds me about time, time pass by without leaving any track and for that time is life. Perhaps i can leave some of my memories here and keep it still, so that it doesn't fade along with time.
Whoo....my thoughts seems a bit solemn here isn't it. Ha ha. Recently my thoughts are quite complicated, exam is coming and i still didn't study much, sort of losing my 'ohm' in life. I gave a deep thought about this and myself. I realized that's actually not an old me. I used to be a student who's very obedient in school and i admit that i used to be a 'bookworm', all mylife's just about scoring good grades.. and good grades....Now i came to realized that life's actually more about love and relationship and family and friends. Life is life itself. but is this a good change, i don't know. Believe or not, i realized myself mature quite a lot since i came to study at shah alam. you once said to me not long ago, "you're different now..." "hoh? towards the good or bad?" i responded. "you're getting mature suddenly, and you talk differently now". Oh, you know your words had surprised me and stay so secure in my heart... feel surprise really, or maybe i used to be such a girl whose thought's always childish, and that's why i muture "suddenly". Ha. But i believe this is a good one, and thank God for that.
It's such a great moment last night to celebrate Weilin's birthday. Fun and full of jokes. But sorry to you guys ya who had been left out in the invitation list. I regret why i don't just sms and ask, really don't know how to explain to you guys. Apologies for that.... And wei lin, so happy to see your surprised face last night and may your birthday wish come true ! (although you seems so paise and didn't really make a wish, ha ha = )